Sunday, June 26, 2016

It'll Show Up


Sunday is my day for reflection, contemplation, and ease. Through the week, something will be floating around my thoughts, rising to the surface. If it is ready for me to look at, I’ll take some time on my day off to explore it a bit.

Funny how that works. Out of the zillions of thoughts, ideas or other bits of information I am surrounded with, something in me says, “pay attention” to some and “ignore” the rest. Like I’ve decided to tuck that bit in the back of my mind to save for later. When I need to visit that same theme again, something else will draw my attention, I’ll see how it’s similar to the older bit, and see if the time is right to form anything out of them.

I guess that’s what creativity is.

Whatever I need to know will show up, because something in me insists on it.

When I am working, I can not reach for information. I can’t demand it comes. I can’t fake it ’til I make it. I must sit and wait and see if it tells me what it wants me to know. I have to expect nothing, and trust in the outcome. Even if the outcome isn’t what I want. Even if it is nothing.

When ideas are flowing, sometimes they all demand my attention at the same time, and I’m left with a muddle that seems to have no cohesive story or form. It’s best then to tuck them all back in my mind and wait until they are ripe.

I don’t remember where I saw it, but I read some time back about how a student of the zen master Shunryu Suzuki told him that she wanted to remember an important point in the talk he had just given. He told her to forget about it, that she already had everything she needed within her. I have tried to live like that since.

Trust is trusting that I can wake up 5 minutes before the alarm, or feel an urge to rise from meditation after 10 minutes. Trust is remembering that what I need to know will show up.

First published October 2011 in my free monthly email newsletter, Starry Night. Sign up here.